Kindness is today’s 30-Day Gratitude Photo Challenge prompt, and this Thursday, Nov. 13, is World Kindness Day so kindness is on my mind. Even though I really value kindness and aspire to be kind, I’m not always aware of what I can do to spread kindness. After a little thought and some quick internet research, I found quite a few simple, inexpensive suggestions I can follow to create some ripples and make the world a kinder place. Here are 10 of my favorites: 

1. Smile and look into the eyes of the grocery store cashier.

2. Pick up trash.

3. If you regularly visit a blog and enjoy it, leave a comment. A simple, “enjoyed your post,” is all you need. (Bloggers appreciate kindness the way resurrection ferns appreciate rain.)

4. Give others the benefit of the doubt. Remember the words of the Egyptian philosopher Philo, “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.”

5. Allow someone to go in front of you, in traffic or in line.

6. Share a store coupon. Some stores offer coupons for X amount of dollars off a minimum purchase. If you’re not going to use yours, find someone in line who looks like he or she has enough merchandise to meet the minimum amount necessary. (This suggestion came from my kind mother-in-law.)

7. Write a note (or send a post card), by hand, add a stamp and mail it. It will make someone’s day to receive “real” mail rather than junk or bills.

8. Donate old towels to an animal shelter or rescue.

9. Pay a toll or buy a cup of coffee for the person behind you.

10. Think before you speak. Even so-called “jokes” can hurt someone who is sensitive.

And don’t forget to be kind to yourself. It’s a lot easier to be kind to others when you practice on yourself!

I’m encouraged to see that there are more and more organizations devoted to promoting kindness, including The Random Acts of Kindness Foundation, One Million Acts of Kindness and Choose to Be Nice. Perhaps one day the kind people will outnumber the trolls and meanies.

No matter how happy we are, most of us would like to be just a little happier. Good news for us—there are plenty of things we can do to feel happier every day that only take a few minutes. Researchers have found a number of quick and easy happiness boosters, such as playing music that makes you feel happy, writing down things that went well and/or things you’re grateful for, or doing something nice for someone else. Here are five more 10-minutes-or-less happiness-boosting recommendations I’ve tried that bring my happiness level up a notch:

1. Cross something off the to-do list. We’re happier when we’ve achieved something, no matter how small. Choose one small task to take from start to finish (change that burnt out light bulb), or a smaller part of a larger project (check airfares for that trip you’re thinking of taking). What matters is completing the action.

2. Meditate. Sit quietly, close your eyes, and breathe. If you like, you can imagine a calming image or place, or focus on your breath. If you find yourself stewing about problems or mentally running through your to-do list, notice those thoughts and let them go. Tell yourself, “I’ll think about those things later.”

3. Laugh. Keep on hand a supply of things that make you laugh—reading material, favorite internet links (I like to scroll through Pinterest’s humor category), and so on. A quick laugh can leave your entire mood elevated. 

4. Pet an animal. Doing so lowers heart rate and stress hormones, while raising hormones that make you feel more relaxed and happy. Scout, Prudy and Tank take turns making me feel happier!

C'mon, pet my tummy...

5. Look through a “joy collection.” I keep a file folder with letters and cards from people I love, photocopies of checks received for writing and editing jobs, and photos that make me smile. Don’t have a joy collection? Start one. Fill it with things that trigger happy memories, such as favorite photos, awards, mementoes, and other symbols of happiness for you.

According to a growing amount of positive psychology research, there seems to be a link between gratitude and happiness. Those with an attitude of gratitude are generally a happier and healthier lot (you can read about more of the benefits of gratitude here: “10 Reasons Why Gratitude is Healthy”). I want to be happier and healthier, and my attitude of gratefulness is one thing I can influence, so why not do some experimenting? I’m ashamed to admit though I have much to be grateful for, I often focus on what I want but don’t have.

With that in mind, in November I’m participating in Dani Dipirro’s (Positively Present) “30-Day Gratitude Photo Challenge.” Every day on Facebook, I will post a photo and brief description of something I’m grateful for, using the prompts she’s provided. I’m doing this for two reasons: First, I do really want to focus on what I’m grateful for. Second, I want to see if I can do something for 30 days straight! I have a bad habit of tearing off all gung ho for a project and quickly losing steam. It’s time I built some stick-to-it muscles. What better way than becoming more mindful of what I’m grateful for?

Today’s prompt is “Dream”—what we dream of, both literally or in the abstract; recurring dreams; what we daydream about.  I could easily have slapped a photo of Tank here and called it a day, because he’s a significant dream come true that I’m grateful for. However, I already posted a photo of him on day one (“Beauty”) and I’d rather not turn this project into a photo album of Tank pictures. Instead, I sat for a few minutes thinking about other dreams I’ve had that have come true, and those still just out of my reach.

What I decided to post today: I’m grateful for the chance to fulfill my desire to write.

Essentially, I’ve been a writer since high school when a creative writing teacher named Marie Tollstrup taught me how to harness the words swirling in my head and shape them into various forms of prose and poetry. I’ve worked as a writer (and editor) full time, part time and freelance my whole adult life. At times I’ve made enough to support myself, and others I’ve made little to nothing. I have been able to spend hours reading and writing and exploring and playing with words, starting pieces and throwing them away, filing them for the future, submitting them for others’ perusal. I haven’t always made the most of my opportunities, whether through fear or distraction or laziness, but I have had the luxury of trying.

If you want to see what else I’m grateful for, you can do so on my Facebook page (click on my Facebook link on the left side of this blog. If we’re not already friends, send me a friend request.) I will also be writing more posts on this challenge on Catching Happiness, but not every day.  And if this sounds like something you want to do, too, please join in! The original challenge can be found at Positively Present, “30-Day Gratitude Photo Challenge: 2014 Edition.”

In the course of cleaning out a closet recently, I found a box of keepsakes from high school. It was educational, to say the least. This box contained treasures such as:

I spent a few happy hours reconstructing my high school days, cringing and blushing at times, surprised at others by how similar my writing voice now is to that of my 17-year-old self.

I had fun reconnecting with the girl I used to be. The exuberance, the highs and lows, the enthusiasm and hunger for life. That girl was easily cast down and just as easily sent soaring. It was in high school that I began to be able to negotiate around my shyness, finding pursuits I loved (writing, drama, tennis) and participating in life on my own terms. It was here that the seeds of who I am today were sown.

Looking at my picture and reading my words, I see a vibrancy that I wish I still had. In comparison, I’ve become muted by life and responsibility, even though that responsibility was taken on willingly and happily: building an adult life, working, raising a child. I see a more refined version of my 17-year-old self in the mirror today—some of the rough edges knocked off, the fears calmed, the goals achieved. What remains is hope for the future, curiosity about what’s next, excitement about what that might be—and yes, a little bit of fear as well. I have learned that fear is normal, and nothing to be, well, feared.

My life now is starting, in small and subtle ways, to have the same sense of possibility I felt at 17. My child is (almost) grown up, I’m settled in my home, I know how to cook and clean, I can pay bills and run my life efficiently. Most of the things I wondered and worried about have come and gone and I can turn my concentration to new possibility. What will the next 10 years hold? I see my journals (not to mention my blog posts!) asking this question. Wondering what the next adventure(s) will be. Wanting to have adventures, everyday and otherwise.

I remember what it felt like to listen to music and dream about the future. I still do that, only now I’m in my home office listening to my iTunes library instead of in my bedroom listening to a turntable. I still jot poetry in a notebook, write in my journal. My future is a bit blurry, as it was then. I’m more deliberate in my choice of opportunities to pursue now, because I have a better idea of what I like and don’t like, what I can excel in. I no longer have adults telling me what to do; I am learning to listen to my voice, because now I have experience and wisdom of my own. I want to incorporate my 17-year-old self’s enthusiasm into my current life, temper her fears with my maturity, and build a future me that combines all the best parts of us.