If you love to read, libraries and bookstores give your soul
a thrill. If you’re an artist, an art or office supply store sets all your
senses tingling. And if you love horses and riding, a tack store is a little
bit of heaven—a horse lover’s happy place.
Last Friday, my friend Marianne and I hit the road to
visit one such horse lover’s happy place: the Dover Saddlery store in Winter Park.
Dover is an English rider’s dream. I bought my very first
horse items from their catalog almost 12 years ago—and I’m still using them!
Dover sends out a couple of fat, drool-inducing catalogs each year, as well as
a couple of smaller sale catalogs. They opened the store in Winter Park in 2013 and I’ve been wanting to visit since then. When I got a flyer for a tent sale
Feb. 5-7, it seemed like a good opportunity to go check it out. Plus I need
a new helmet because mine is getting old…you know, any old excuse! Marianne was
willing to tag along and navigate, and she was looking for a new halter for her
mare, Glory.
When we arrived, sales girls handed us large, clear plastic
bags to toss our loot into, and we entered the tent excited to see what
bargains we could find. I was only slightly hampered by the fact that I don’t
really need anything, other than the helmet and maybe another pair of riding socks. That didn’t stop me from walking up every aisle and examining
tempting items like wicking riding shirts, horse blankets, small mesh hay
feeders, and yes, patterned socks.
When we were done with the tent, we still had the store
itself to explore. As soon as I walked in the door, I inhaled that leathery
scent that makes my blood pressure fall and all my stress melt away. When I
tell you that we covered nearly every inch of the store, I do not exaggerate.
(Marianne has been there before, but she kindly allowed me all the exploring
time I wanted.) Breeches, helmets, horse treats, more socks, grooming tools,
leather goods and saddle pads…the store was packed with items to tempt us.
Riding socks are a thing. |
Alas, they didn’t have a helmet that fit me properly in my
price range, so I’m still in the market. (I did learn that my head shape is
more round than oval—who knew?) However, I did find these lovely items:
Socks, gloves, and a purple pad--oh my! |
It was a pleasure to spend time with Marianne, and we talked horses to our hearts’ content. The
new horsey items were a bonus. I love my socks and Tank looks lovely in his new
purple pad.
Where is your happy place? How long has it been since you visited?
Loved this store display. |
Photo courtesy Mirko Delcaldo |
Introduction by Ted Kooser: The first two lines of
this poem pose a question many of us may have thought about: how does snow make
silence even more silent? And notice Robert Haight’s deft use of color, only
those few flecks of red, and the rest of the poem pure white. And silent, so
silent. Haight lives in Michigan, where people know about snow.
How Is It That the Snow
How is it that the snow
amplifies the silence,
slathers the black bark on limbs,
heaps along the brush rows?
Some deer have stood on their hind legs
to pull the berries down.
Now they are ghosts along the path,
snow flecked with red wine stains.
This silence in the timbers.
A woodpecker on one of the trees
taps out its story,
stopping now and then in the lapse
of one white moment into another.
American Life in Poetry is made possible by The Poetry
Foundation (www.poetryfoundation.org), publisher of Poetry magazine. It is also
supported by the Department of English at the University of Nebraska, Lincoln.
Poem copyright ©2002 by Robert Haight from his most recent book of poetry,
“Emergences and Spinner Falls,” New Issues Poetry and Prose, 2002. Reprinted by
permission of Robert Haight. Introduction copyright © 2008 by The Poetry
Foundation. The introduction’s author, Ted Kooser, served as United States Poet
Laureate Consultant in Poetry to the Library of Congress from 2004-2006. We do
not accept unsolicited manuscripts.
I’m glad you asked. Habits are the subject of Gretchen
Rubin’s (The Happiness Project) newest book, Better Than Before: Mastering the Habits of Our Everyday Lives, which came out in paperback in
December. In it, she explores 21 proven strategies that help
people change their habits.
Why are habits so important? And what is the connection
between habits and happiness? One of the keys to happiness, according to Rubin, is an atmosphere
of growth, and creating good habits helps us to grow. She notes that 40 percent
of our behavior is repeated almost daily, and that “Habits are the invisible
architecture of daily life.” Once established, habits free us from decision
making, which preserves our self-control. Once a habit is in place, “We can
effortlessly do the things we want to do,” she writes.
Think about it. You probably get up at the same time every
day, eat a limited range of foods, and choose from a handful of leisure
activities. Cementing the habits you want would improve the quality of your
life and make you happier.
Rubin discusses a number of strategies to help you master
your habits—strategies including monitoring (“find a way to count it”),
foundation (first tackle the most obvious habits you want to change, such as
exercise, sleep, eating healthy or decluttering), scheduling (write it down and
be specific about when you’ll do it), and accountability (face consequences for
what you do and don’t do). But one of the most helpful things in her book was a
discussion of the Four Tendencies—the four general ways most people respond to
expectations. Different strategies work better for different tendencies. (You
can take Rubin’s quiz to find which tendency you are here.) I’m an Obliger: I respond well to outer
expectations, but don’t always meet inner expectations—in other words, if I
tell you I’ll do something, I’ll do it. If I tell myself I’ll do
something, I might not.
Rubin also discusses different ways to get started, whether
you begin with baby steps, with a clean slate (as at the New Year), or make a
sudden and major change to your habits (the “lightning bolt”), and many other
strategies to help you shape your habits. These include learning how to spot
loopholes, using distraction, and pairing something you like to do (read a
magazine) with the habit you want to establish (working out on a cardio
machine). She concludes the book by noting how “considering ourselves in
comparison to others” can help you understand yourself better and in so doing,
discover which techniques work best for you.
I found Better Than Before easy to read and filled
with practical advice on mastering habits. There’s just something I like about
Rubin’s down-to-earth style. I’ve used some of the strategies from Better
Than Before to establish a few happy habits of my own. I track my workouts
in my planner and hate to see more than one day go by without some type of
exercise noted (monitoring). I leave a glass near the coffee pot so I’ll drink
water when I get up every morning (convenience); and I hide the chips and
cookies so I don’t see them every time I open the pantry (inconvenience—I know
I could just not buy them, but I live with two people who would bring them in
if I didn’t). I also exchange lists of goals with a friend each week
(accountability). Armed with Rubin’s suggestions, I believe 2016 will be
better than before.
What are your happy habits? What strategies did you use to establish them?