“Happiness is neither virtue nor pleasure nor this thing nor
that but simply growth. We are happy when we are growing.”
—William Butler Yeats
For the past week, I’ve found myself waking every morning
from anxious dreams. I’m OK during the day when I can use my conscious mind to
relax, but by night, my subconscious takes over…and evidently it’s worried. I
suspect this is a reaction to the level of anxiety in my nation and the world
right now. While I can’t seem to help being anxious and worried about the
future, I realize that those feelings are completely useless and are robbing me
of joy. Maybe you feel the same? So I’ve been actively trying to reduce my
anxiety levels instead of pretending things are fine or simply distracting
myself. Here are four things I’m doing to combat anxious feelings:
- Accept that yes, I live in troubled times. There is suffering, hate, misogyny, fear. This, sadly, is nothing new. We will always have to fight the darkness if we don’t want it to overcome the light.
- Refuse to add to the darkness by expressing hate for people or institutions I don’t like or disagree with. (Yes, I’m allowed to dislike and disagree—but I don’t have to express my opinions and feelings in a bombastic, dogmatic way.) Don’t add to my fear by reading and watching lots of news. Avoid lengthy discussions about problems the world faces. When I do choose to read the news, I choose the most unbiased sources I can find, look for context, and don’t accept stories without verifying. I don’t bother with sources that specialize in half-truths or click bait, even if they’re primarily intended as entertainment.
- Support my body, mind, and spirit with uplifting, anxiety-reducing simple pleasures. Use my essential oils to calm anxiety and support my immune system. Be present and mindful. Enjoy the cooler weather we’re having by walking more, and opening the windows for some fresh air (I rarely do that here because of the humidity). Spend extra time with Tank, my four-legged therapist. Listen to happy music while working. Read a good book. (Check out Belle’s list of spirit lifting books here and mine here.)
- Look for ways to spread kindness and happiness. Encourage others, donate money, be a good citizen. Be kind, help out, stay positive. Don’t give up on looking and hoping for the best.
There’s nothing ground-breaking here, but that doesn’t mean
these practices are either easy or worthless. They are within my power to do,
as so many other things are not.
As Corrie ten Boom said, “Worry does not empty tomorrow of
its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.” Now if only I could convince my
subconscious of that.
How do you soothe yourself when you feel anxious?
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| Photo courtesy Andreas Nusko |
Introduction by Ted Kooser: My maternal grandparents
got their drinking water from a well in the yard, and my disabled uncle carried
it sloshing to the house, one bucket of hard red water early every morning. I
couldn’t resist sharing this lovely little poem by Minnesota poet, Sharon
Chmielarz.
New Water
All those years—almost a hundred—
the farm had hard water.
Hard orange. Buckets lined in orange.
Sink and tub and toilet, too,
once they got running water.
And now, in less than a lifetime,
just by changing the well’s location,
in the same yard, mind you,
the water’s soft, clear, delicious to drink.
All those years to shake your head over.
Look how sweet life has become;
you can see it in the couple who live here,
their calmness as they sit at their table,
the beauty as they offer you new water to drink.
Reprinted by permission of Sharon Chmielarz, whose most recent collection of poems is “The Rhubarb King,” Loonfeather Press, 2006. Copyright © 2006 by Sharon Chmielarz. This weekly column is supported by The Poetry Foundation, The Library of Congress, and the Department of English at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln. We do not accept unsolicited manuscripts.
Books
How to Have More Everyday Adventures, or What I Learned From Linda Formichelli’s How to Do It All
January 20, 2017
If you want to enrich your life with activities
that inspire you, and you’d like a jumpstart into action, then Linda
Formichelli’s newest book How to Do It All: The Revolutionary Plan to Createa Full, Meaningful Life—While Only Occasionally Wanting to Poke Your Eyes Out With a Sharpie is a good place to start.
You don’t have to use all—or any—of them; you can choose
your own Desires. Formichelli offers examples of three levels of goals for each
Desire, from very simple to more involved. For example, if your Desire was to
travel more, a simple goal could be taking a day trip; a more complicated one
would be taking an overseas trip.
What are some everyday adventures you’d like to experience in 2017?
How to D-I-A flies in the face of the ubiquitous
advice to slow down and simplify your life. Formichelli writes, “Would you
rather look back on a year that was full of fun, adventure—and yes, some
stress—or remember a year where you floated through your days stress-free, but
that’s pretty much all you did?” She does not believe stress is always bad for
you, or that everything we do we (should) do for someone else (and neither do I).
One of the more helpful tools for me was the exercise in
determining your top three values—the why behind your Desires. Once
you’re clear on what you value, it’s much easier to see what goals will be
easier to follow through with. Another plus is a packet of worksheets at the
end of the book, also available to download.
I appreciated the advice to rethink my schedule and habits
to give my D-I-A Desires prime time, not just the dregs of time left over after
I do everything else. The book was worth reading for the energy boost and
motivation alone. My only caution would be to remember you determine
what feels full and what feels too busy for you. Formichelli has a remarkable
amount of energy if she’s anything like she comes across in print, and I would
be exhausted and unhappy if I tried to do as much as she does.
I found How to Do It All readable, practical, and
entertaining, and I recommend it for anyone looking to enrich her life with
meaningful activities.
What are some everyday adventures you’d like to experience in 2017?
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| Photo courtesy Karl Fredrickson |
“Happiness is within
the reach of everyone, rich or poor. Yet comparatively few people are happy. I
believe the reason for this is that the majority don't recognize happiness even
when it is
within their grasp.”
—Robert
Baden-Powell
